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Hogarth judge

November 2018

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'The ansestorial gods'

the ansestrial gods were created by the dark one {Amatavalu} eon before the begining of recorded history they where the harbrigers of doom and his ebacerys to the abysys, the demonic lords that would ensure his rule over the corporial relm of man and at last give him dominion over all existance they where three at first Shandarus the god of hate malice and war he was created from the great war that history forgot and was the first to be born. The war was started when man grew strong with the dark ones influnecne they began to lose control of both there minds and there form thus the great war began this was not a war of kings or men but the monsters that they became it would have been entral victory for darkness had not a few wize monks at the temple of veltoru found a way to clence themselfs of all hate they where the ultimate pacafists and after sealing themselves away within the {miran} a legandary fortris they enterd a state of the utmost meditation to keep out all eveil and stregthen the bariers that held back the evil and protected there souls from the unimaginable will of the dark one.


Outside in the dusty plans of the torn and blood spaterd lands The war ragged on the old ones and eldar deamons ross from sleep the comotion even broght back from the earth long since lost races like the tonku great hornd beasts 40feet in size and covered in spikes and the lrolath shadows that can gain corporial form and tear flesh from bone in a single strike. man trasformed and in those hored mutations thousands of new deamons were born and died like fire to a flame the war went on every one for themselfs and everyone out for blood finally after forty years the last of them was dead all man and beast was reduced to somldering ash but the dark one knew somthing was wrong turning his gaze to the gates of miran he saw the lone surviors the monks had returnd from the deep sleep unscathd by the horros and perserved from even time itself even with all the death and harted that had just encured the dark one still did not have the power to enter the phisical world in his pure from as long as these monks remaind.


However He would not be sttoped with all his might and from the echoing souls of those slain in battle he sumoned the first of the ansestorial gods Shandarus was born god of malice and hate his first task was to iradicate the monks of the miran and as he licked his razor bladed lips a shiver sprang down the spin of every living thing left in the stone coved sactuary as they knew the fight of there lives was about to begin. It was to be a battle of the tree aginst the gale for the magicly honed and garded fortress said to have craved from the very stones of creation itself would now have to suffer the full force of a god but as the influnce of the dark one was still ripe throughout the land if the raisedso much as a finger in anger or revenge they risk falling under his spell and truning into the horrors that had killed in glutony for the last forty years for now only defence was posible.

Comments

Been reading the BJAODN wiki, have we?

nostalgia trip

Re: nostalgia trip

Technically, this is not so much semi-literate as pre-literate. As Prof. Lynch has pointed out, the text has all the earmarks of a written transcription of oral performance.

It is not that our poet is inept; he's just switching media without making some adjustments that become second nature when you're used to dealing with written rather than spoken words. Look at how much it improves by reformatting it as blank verse:

the ansestrial gods were created by the dark one
{Amatavalu}
eon before the begining of recorded history
they where the harbrigers of doom
and his ebacerys to the abysys,
the demonic lords that would ensure
his rule over the corporial relm of man
and at last give him dominion over all existance
they where three at first
Shandarus the god of hate malice and war
he was created from the great war that history forgot
and was the first to be born.


The text divides itself into breath units, much like the prose of Le Morte d' Arthur, rather than through clauses not meant to be spoken aloud, and whose relationships require punctuation for clarity.

Recast into verse, it becomes a lot easier to follow, as well as becoming more epic and METAL! It's epic in other ways as well. You will note that the character Shandarus has a Homeric epithet. Each time his name appears we are reminded that he's god of hate, malice, and war.

This was meant to be oral exposition by the dungeon master at the start of the campaign, and in its appropriate set and setting it gets its job done.

I still haven't figured out what "ebacerys" is, though. ("Embassies? Emissaries?")

Edited at 2010-08-03 02:23 pm (UTC)